One year in the books.

Whew!

The first year’s behind us. They say (whoever “they” are…) that if you make it through the first year, the rest of the years are a piece of cake! Well, we did it! Today we’ve been married a year. It’s absolutely insane how fast time flies. I thought, to commemorate the date, I’d write a little blog about what I’ve learned my first year as a wife.

I don’t know nearly as much about marriage, wifelyhood, servitude, obedience, patience, or grace as I thought I did before I was married.

This, from Cindy this morning, sums it up:
“Marriage isn’t supposed to make you happy, it’s supposed to make you holy.”
True, true. Happiness is a by product of holiness, but the Lord is the joy-giver.

It’s more important for me to be obedient to the Lord in my submission to my husband, than RIGHT. Ouch, that’s a toughie.

Sports center is NOT the enemy. Neither is Golf. :) I would rather have a happy husband that an empty trashcan. After all, he gives me grace even when the laundry is waist deep!

Silly is the best way to be.

A man with a lot of underwear is a gem indeed. And one who wears things multiple times before considering them “dirty” is to be praised.

Girl time is still just as necessary post- “I do” as it was pre- “I do.”

He didn’t marry Betty Crocker. And I don’t have to pretend to be her…. Sometimes the best dinners are PB&J with chips.

Pre-marital counseling is easy… but everyone should invest in post-marital counseling the first year. It allows you to “duke it out” with a referee.

Marriage is a process…


It’s interesting to me to see people who aren’t married and those who are and to see that there is no way to explain to those who aren’t how it is to be. They just have to wait till they are to be able to see how it is. Maybe it’s like heaven in that respect.

I thought I knew a lot about how I would be or it would be, and it is different than what I thought. And others I've talked to say the same. Again and again, I am reminded that this life is not about me, but about the Lord and His glory. It’s about being stretched and chiseled- both of which can be painful, but both of which produce a beautiful holiness…. a likeness less like self and more like the Savior.

In anything, but especially marriage, it’s easy to look at unbelievers and think, “wow, they’ve got it so easy—everything is just so simple and smooth for them.” But I think I’ve learned a lot about trials and that they are from the Lord BECAUSE he loves us. It’s easy to consider those who have an "easy" situation, Blessed. But for those of us who live in the real world, who face trails of all kinds, we can cling to Romans 5:3, “we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us.” We can be excited and thankful over trials! Not that it's easy or anything...

So many of the Believers that I have spoken with, both young and old, have a testimony of chiseling and stretching during their early years of marriage. I think it is a sweet thing to see believers molded in this way, because in Hebrews 12, we are given insight into what is taking place. “Our fathers disciplined us for a little while as they thought best; but God disciplines us for our good, that we may share in his holiness. No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it.”

What a Joy it is to be refined by the Lord! To be challenged and not to be left the same as we were. To look forward to the day of harvest when the growing that is happening now will be gathered up and presented to the Lord as a magnificent gift.

Marriage is fun-- I'd recommend it. Just make sure you stay within the fence.

Aloha!

Since I hadn't posted in a VERRRRRY long time-- and the main reason for doing so now is that it's spring break (no school tomorrow yay!) and I've got terrible jet-lag and can't sleep (shucks) --- I thought I'd give ya a peek into what has definitely become my favorite vacation spot :)

Benjamin works for Farm Bureau insurance. (If you're lookin for a good insurance company, and a studly insurace salesman, he's your guy) Each year they have a big incentive trip that really hard working agents can win. Well my B won it and this years trip was to Maui, Hawaii! Wow! It's the prettiest place I've ever seen. I really think the Lord was showing off when he made it cause everything about it just makes you want to PRAISE him! :)

The first day we were out there was my birthday! How many first year wives get to spend their first married birthday in Maui?! (B set that up just right didn't he?! :) We had a ball! )

a volcano! we're in the middle of the ocean on a volcano! crazyness.

now THAT is a good lookin man!

at the gala. (that isn't a real waterfall in case you were wondering)

that is a whale's tail. i know it doesn't look big here, but they weigh about 90,000 lbs. whoa. they're big. trust me.

kapalua bay-- lots of pretty fishies to be seen with snorkels. (what a funny word: snorkel. Snorkel. Snorkel. Snorkel. hehe:) )

we hadn't exactly spent a lot of time in the sun yet, but the fishies didn't mind :) We saw a blowfish! Hootie'd been proud.

This was on our balcony! How pretty!

the spa day was my favorite part :) massage and pedicure- ya can't beat it!

this is a pineapple. it is growing in a pineapple plant in the lobby of our hotel. it takes two years to grow one pineapple. I am a big fan of pineapple... but not so much the canned kind- only the fresh kind. pineapple in hawaii tastes like candy if you go, you should make sure to get some.

I ate sushi! it was so yummy! No imitation crab in the rainbow rolls of hawaii... no sir ree. only the real deal. yum! (Don't knock it til you've tried it--- well, i admit, I had to try it about three times before i liked it :) But I think there's something in the wasabi that is mildly addicting.)

ahhh... the picture of relaxation...

Trust in the mourning

I still have all four of my grandparents. Better yet, I still have all SIX of my grandparents since my dad is married to my step mom and her parents are still alive as well. I haven't ever lost anybody close to me and for that I am thankful. But I know it will happen because we act like it is a normal thing that people live but an abnormal thing when they die- Even though we know in the back of our heads that everybody dies, it's almost like we don't really believe that. Probably because we weren't created to die- we were created to live forever but the fall put a stop to that and so since we weren't created to die, we don't know how to handle it. We know how to celebrate births because we were made to be born and we know how to celebrate weddings because we were made to wed, but death, we weren't made for death.

Seeing what my principal and her husband are going through is just heart breaking and mind bending. The Lord says that he won't give us a test that is more than we can stand- and maybe that's why i haven't ever lost anybody- I don't know if I could stand it. And why is that? I don't know- Maybe because I wonder about eternity. I know that I know that I know that I love the Lord and that He is mine and I am His- but as far as anybody else, I don't know where they stand with him and that is a huge burden to me. I guess there are two remedies to this burden. Number one: the Lord is in control. And Number two: the Lord is in control. He is big enough and strong enough and capable enough to call people unto himself. He called me, didn't he? AND He is faithful to His promise that He will be our righteousness.

In Jeremiah 33:16 Gods says that Judah (which represents people who are saved) will be called:
"The Lord Our Righteousness." Now, this is an interesting thought to me because it is saying that this will be our name. Our name will be called, "The Lord Our Righteousness." As in, "Hello, my name is, 'The Lord Our Righteousness.'" Or "yes, this is my friend, 'The Lord Our Righteousness.'" I like this. I like thinking of myself in this light because it has nothing to do with me. The Lord is my righteousness. The Lord is anybody's righteousness who calls on Him. I once asked the question of which name would be in the Lamb's book when I get to heaven, jessica hunter or jessica ryan and I got to thinking, maybe it will be "The Lord Our Righteousness." If that is what we who believe are to be called.

I feel a sting to death since I don't know whether people are in heaven or not. I feel like I can't be celebrational since I have no confirmation of arrival. This is a very heavy and sad feeling and I am not quite sure how you get past it. If it is true that the Lord is in control, which I know it is, and if it is true that He really does give life to some people even though we all deserve death then I suppose I can only praise Him for his mercy and trust his judgement. Who am I- one who has been given mercy and called by the name "The Lord Our Righteousness" -to doubt the very one who has made me righteous- God who even made it possible or ever entertained the idea of giving me His righteousness. He is certainly good.

We do not have to call evil, good or sad, happy. He does not ask that of us. He understands our pain because he has been there. He tells us to mourn with those who are mourning. He tells us to Trust in Him with all our heart and lean not on our own understanding. I can't remember who it is, but somebody once said
"Don't let what you don't know make you question what you do know."
More than ever, in times or mourning, loss and grief, we must place ourselves "Before the throne of God above" where "we have a strong and perfect plea a great high priest- whose name is love who ever lives and pleads for me. My name is graven on His hands, my name is written on His heart, I know that while in heav'n he stands, no tongue can bid me thence depart- no tongue can bid me thence depart.

When satan tempts me to dispair and tells me of the guilt within upward I look to see Him there, who made an end to all my sin. Because the sinless savior died, my sinful soul is counted free, for God the just is satisfied, to look on him and pardon me- to look on him and pardon me.

Behold him there the risen Lamb. My perfect spotless righteousness, the great unchangeable I AM the king of Glory and of Grace. One with himself I cannot die, my soul is purchased by His blood, my life is hid with Christ on High- with Christ my savior and my God... with Christ my savior and my God..."

Please Pray

Please pray for my pricipal, Jo Mayer and her husband Charlie (who is the assistant principal at Lexington High where I graduated) as they are going through a time that I cannot begin to fathom.

Copied from "Thestate.com":

Brother, sister mourned after crash

Educators’ children die in I-77 wreck

By ADAM BEAM
Staff Writer

The only son and daughter of two Lexington 1 school administrators died in a traffic accident Friday on I-77 in Fairfield County.
Carrie Mayer-Cowan, 29, and Benjamin Mayer, 23, died after their 2006 Toyota Scion crossed the median on I-77 and was hit on the passenger side by a Dodge Durango, according to Lance Cpl. Dwight Green with the South Carolina Highway Patrol. Troopers did not know why their car traveled across the median.
Both died at the scene, Fairfield County Coroner Joe Silvia said.
The two were the children of Jo Mayer, principal of White Knoll High School, and Charles Mayer, an assistant principal at Lexington High school.
Carrie Mayer-Cowan was a chemistry teacher at Hanahan High School in Berkeley County. Benjamin Mayer was an engineer at Mabry Engineering in Five Points. Both had graduated with honors from Lexington High School.
At his home Sunday night in Lexington, Charles Mayer was holding fast to memories of his family.
He recalled how, for a $75 upgrade fee, an Alamo rental car salesperson in Phoenix let him rent a Cadillac for his family’s 1992 vacation — with unlimited mileage.
“The Mayer family has been known to do vacation in attack mode,” he said. “We turned the vehicle back in after about two weeks, and it went from 400 miles on it to a little over 5,200 miles on it.
“But we saw the West.”
The Mayers say that community support in response to their loss has been tremendous.
“The house has been full,” Jo Mayer said. “The night we got the news, we were at my brother’s house, and people started arriving then just before we even had a handle on anything. Since we’ve been at home, it’s just been people constantly, and we appreciate that. That’s the kind of support that we need and will continue to need.”
Carrie Mayer-Cowan was in love with nature, a passion that led her to teach at the Catalina Island Marine Institute off the coast near Los Angeles. There she met her husband, Joe Cowan, and the two bounced across the country studying wildlife and biology.
Cowan said his wife was a gentle perfectionist — only getting angry at herself when she “didn’t realize how perfect she was.” Cowan said his grief is still so new that it will take a while “for it to really seem real.”
“I think the times I hurt the worst are not even now but the next months and years when I think about what our life would have been like together,” he said.
Benjamin Mayer was a year out of Clemson, working at Mabry Engineering. His parents remember him for the novel he started when he was 12, his SAT team’s state championship and his volunteer work with the S.C. Wildlife Federation.
“Carrie was probably more outgoing, more assured of herself,” Charles Mayer said. “Ben was more reserved, but he’d trick you when he had a chance.”
The Mayers have started the Mayer-Cowan Scholarship Fund as a memorial. Donations may be sent to the Lexington School District 1 Education Foundation, care of Connie McFarland, P.O. Box 1869, Lexington, SC 29701.
Memorials may also be sent to the S.C. Wildlife Federation at 2711 Middleburg Drive, Suite 101, Columbia, SC 29204.
Reach Beam at (803) 771-8405 or abeam@thestate.com.

Benjamin E. Mayer
LEXINGTON — Services for Benjamin E. Mayer, 23, will be held Tuesday, December 20, 2005, at 11:00 a.m. at St. Stephen’s Lutheran Church with interment to follow in Providence Lutheran Church Cemetery. The family will receive friends Monday, December 19, 2005, from 5:00 until 8:00 p.m. at Caughman-Harman Funeral Home, Lexington Chapel. Memorials may be made to The Mayer Cowan Scholarship Fund of Lexington School District #1 Education Foundation, in care of Connie McFarland at PO Box 1869, Lexington, SC 29071 or the S.C. Wildlife Federation at 2711 Middleburg Drive, Suite 101, Columbia, SC 29204.
Benjamin died Friday, December 16, 2005. Born in Lexington County, he was the son of Charles A. and Nancy Jo Harmon Mayer. He was a 2000 Honor Graduate of Lexington High School. While there, he was a member of the 1999 State Championship SAT Team and the Wildcat Staff. He was a National Merit Commended Student. In 2004, he graduated from Clemson University with a B.S. Degree in Civil Engineering.
Benjamin was employed with Mabry Engineering of Columbia. He was a member of and often volunteered with the SC Wildlife Federation. He was a gifted artist and writer with a passion for life and natural warmth that brought a smile to all he encountered. Benjamin was a member of St. Stephen’s Lutheran Church.
Surviving are his parents, Charles A. and Nancy Jo Harmon Mayer of Lexington and paternal grandparents, Albert and Ethel Mayer of Peak. He was joined in death with his sister, Carrie Mayer-Cowan and preceded in death by maternal grandparents, Royce H. “Buster” and Winnie Seay Harmon and paternal grandmother, Margaret Weaks Mayer. Other family members are aunts and uncles, Pam and Bob Harmon, of Lexington and Luanne and Jim Mayer of Peak.

Carrie E. Mayer-Cowan
CHARLESTON — Services for Carrie E. Mayer-Cowan, 29, will be held Tuesday, December 20, 2005, at 11:00 a.m. at St. Stephen’s Lutheran Church with interment to follow in Providence Lutheran Church Cemetery. The family will receive friends Monday, December 19, 2005, from 5:00 until 8:00 p.m. at Caughman-Harman Funeral Home, Lexington Chapel. Memorials may be made to The Mayer Cowan Scholarship Fund of Lexington School District #1 Education Foundation, in care of Connie McFarland at PO Box 1869, Lexington, SC 29071 or the S.C. Wildlife Federation at 2711 Middleburg Drive, Suite 101, Columbia, SC 29204.
Carrie died Friday, December 16, 2005. Born in Lexington County, she was the daughter of Charles A. and Nancy Jo Harmon Mayer. She was a 1994 Honor Graduate of Lexington High School. While there, she was an active participant in student government. As a varsity cheerleader, she was on two State Championship teams and competed at the national level. She was a member of the LHS Track Team in the High Jump Event. She also participated in the Teacher Cadet Program. In 1998, she graduated from the College of Charleston with a B.S. Degree in Biology.
After graduation, she followed a career path that allowed her to fulfill her passion for the earth’s oceans and for all of nature. For two years, she worked as a Marine Science Educator for the Catalina Island Marine Institute, off the coast of Los Angeles, CA. During that time, she was also an Education Intern at the Monterey Bay Aquarium. After leaving Catalina, she taught Marine Science at the Marine Resources Development Foundation of Key Largo, FL.
After that, she sought to share her passion for wildlife with students in the public schools of South Carolina. Her first teaching job was at St. John’s High School in Charleston. Most recently, she taught Chemistry at Hanahan High School in Berkley County. While teaching, she was pursuing a degree in Educational Leadership at The Citadel. Carrie was a member of St. Stephen’s Lutheran Church in Lexington, the SC Marine Educator’s Association and the SC Wildlife Federation.
Surviving are her husband, Joe Cowan of Charleston; parents, Charles A. and Nancy Jo Harmon Mayer of Lexington and paternal grandparents, Albert and Ethel Mayer of Peak. She was joined in death with her brother, Benjamin E. Mayer and preceded in death by maternal grandparents, Royce H. “Buster” and Winnie Seay Harmon and paternal grandmother, Margaret Weaks Mayer. Other family members are aunts and uncles, Pam and Bob Harmon, of Lexington and Luanne and Jim Mayer of Peak.
www.caughmanharmanfuneralhome.com

Tech Support?!

anybody have any idea how i can get the side bar to be in line the text on my blog ?

Benjamin and I rang the salvation army bell outside of walmart last night. His mama signed up to find people for the day and we were the 6:30 to 8:00 shift! The words "michelin man" come to mind... :)

Of couse we picked the freezingest day ever! We had on like 6 jackets-We look like we weigh about 400 pounds! I showed my kids today at school and they said, "Mrs. Ryan yall look fat!" haha- honesty is good i guess! :)

Looking for that "perfect gift?"

We all go around at Christmas time looking for just the right gift for our friends/loved ones to show them that we care about them and appreciate them. Well, if you've searched long and hard and still come up empty, a Klong may be just what you need. "It's for everyone!" You can get one for your mom, your dad, your brother, your sister, husband or wife. And they will really know how much you care about them. On the order page, click on the advertisement to the right to see more Klong benefits! Wow.

Click here to order.

"Next!"

Here's a deep, theological question for you:

It says in the Bible that
"God, [has] saved us and called us to a holy life—not because of anything we have done but because of his own purpose and grace [that] was given us in Christ Jesus before the beginning of time..."
and that
"only those whose names are written in the Lamb's book of life"
will enter heaven.

So my question is: when the angel at the lamb's book yell's "Next-" do you think I should have them look me up by Jessica Hunter or Jessica Ryan?

this could have quite an impact!

Praise the Lord for the tree...

...in my neighbors yard
which he was walking behind
with his dog
in front of their house
across the street
where there were no cars
or kids
at the bottom of our inclined driveway
upon which our garage sits
where I park my car
that I got out of
and walked up the stairs
to punch the garage door button
only to look back and see

my car rolling out of the garage
down our inclined driveway
across the street
down the hill
into my neighbors yard
toward his house
where he was walking his dog
and into the tree.
Praise the Lord for the tree.

You must put your car in "Park" if you wish for it to remain that way.

Anybody looking to sell a good car?

Hurry and get here Turkey Day!

I am already ready already for Thanksgiving break! :) Here's a funny lil turkey day dance- turn up your music and listen. Click Here

A glimpse into my days at school...

Jason Grier had this (click here) very funny website link on his blog that lets you build yourself in legos! How fantastic! This is me at school... I wear my black Dansko shoes everyday or else my back is killin by the end of the day... lots of days a scarf.. around the waist or the neck... and most always I have my mug with hot tea. Jasmine green tea. With Splenda. Most days my hair starts off like this and ends up in a pony tail. Also, I keep my pencil in hand to mark down all the bad kids in my, "Ah-woo-woo" Behavior Log. It is getting quite full. Today, after the pep rally, I was walking in the crowded hall and somebody pulled my hair. Real Mature. Mmmm, I love high schoolers.

Thanks for the encouraging comments on the last post... I'm truckin along... report cards come out next week. I'm 1/4 of the way through the year! Yippee! :) I'm praying about next year. I love to teach, but I'm dying to get into a class with some Deaf kids. When they talk back it isn't quite as annoying. :) There's a job opening in Richland one teaching their middle school Deaf class. That'd be pretty sweet... except I'd have to drive 45 min. to work everyday. I'd spend my entire salary on transportation to and from! Oh well, it'll work out. The Lord is good like that.